• Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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    5 days ago

    “traveling” yikes.

    That is one way to say, you think wealth is attractive.

    I have traveled quite a bit and I like it a lot, but it is no hobby. For it to be a hobby, I would have to have a lot more money.

    Once or even twice a year, is hardly a hobby.

    • frickineh@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      It could also just be women thinking, “I’d like to visit _____ when I’m able, I want my partner to go with me.” Working in a passport office, I’ve met a shocking number of men who have never left the US (or sometimes even the state) by choice. Then their wife or girlfriend wants to go to Mexico or something, and they come in talking about how they’re only doing it for her and they’d never travel if it was up to them.

      Anyway, I’d consider traveling one of my hobbies even though I can’t afford to do it often - plenty of time is spent planning and looking at things to do, so it goes beyond just the few days of the trip.

      • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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        5 days ago

        I think so too.

        I’ve met people who are extremely happy living in their small town life doing small town things, then get angry or confused why anybody would want to go someplace “exotic”.

        • Aceticon@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          Maybe “travelling as a hobby” as a women’s preference with regards to men is at about it being a man’s openness and ability to deal with totally different environments, disposable income, time availability and possibly foreign language skills.

      • BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        I’m one of those people. I’ve never flown, rarely leave my state. My wife wants to travel, but we haven’t yet. I, personally, have no interest in it. Just like sports and most popular movie franchises. I just have no feelings about it at all. It seems like a huge hassle.

        • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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          5 days ago

          Yea same. New places, new people, and trying to figure out where I’m going stress me the fuck out. A vacation is just a whole week of that. No thanks. I want to use my time off to relax. If someone else wants to plan the whole thing and I just follow them around it’s fine but I don’t want to deal with that shit myself. It’s not enjoyable to me at all.

        • frickineh@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          I don’t think there’s necessarily anything wrong with that, it’s just not going to be compatible with everyone. I would never date anyone who didn’t prioritize travel at least a little, but that’s definitely not universal.

        • saigot@lemmy.ca
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          5 days ago

          It’s unclear what countries this poll includes, having minimum paid leave is the law in most of the world. There’s also quite a few careers that involve forced time off.

        • IMNOTCRAZYINSTITUTION@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          If you live at home or are technically homeless it doesn’t really matter. If you can save up a bit and have a charismatic personality you can go far, especially if you’re willing to pick up shitty temporary jobs in places where you go. I had a friend who would do this all the time and periodically return home to work at a reliable job while living with a friend, save up more, then fly off to somewhere for a few months.

            • frickineh@lemmy.world
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              5 days ago

              “Fun” fact, this is actually why my mom has no interest in camping as an adult. Her family was homeless a lot when she was a kid and her mom disguised it as a fun extended camping trip. The kids bought it for the most part, because the family really did camp for fun, and they were used to fishing for dinner and things, but she said as she got older, she realized things like the month long trip in November were because they lost their housing.

              • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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                4 days ago

                My wife hates camping. She needs electricity, a toilet, wifi, etc.

                I never thought about why until your comment. My wife moved houses every few months as a kid. Maybe 10-15 times total before before college.

      • bluewing@lemm.ee
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        5 days ago

        For the vast majority of you, long travel is required to get to somewhere you can backpack. And the the gear and foodstuffs is expensive also. And judging by the damages to the environment that some inconsiderate people leave these days, I’m not sure that you should be allowed to. (I’m getting sick and tired of picking up garbage and hauling it out of the forest I live in).

        • NielsBohron@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          “Backpacking” can also mean couch surfing and staying in hostels or on park benches. In the early 2000’s, it was a really popular way to travel across Europe (at least among rich white college kids)

          • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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            4 days ago

            Is hostels still a thing for young people?

            I wonder if AirBnB destroyed that industry. I saw a “hostel” in my city but it was charging $70 a night. When I was growing up, hostels were like $20-30 a night, cheaper than a motel 6.

            • NielsBohron@lemmy.world
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              4 days ago

              Afaik, they’re still around, but inflation and popularity has caused the prices to increase a fair bit.

      • The_v@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        Or be in a religious cult like Mormons. Of course they will send you to a foreign country and confiscate your passport until your 1.5-2 years are over.

        • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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          4 days ago

          Do they really confiscate your passport?!

          Holy shit thats what Dubai employers do to keep their servants enslaved!

    • merc@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      A lot of these hobbies are wealth-adjacent.

      Playing an instrument: a good instrument isn’t cheap, and music lessons can be pretty expensive.

      Woodworking requires a lot of fairly expensive tools, and a space to do it. You can’t really have woodworking as a hobby if you live in a small studio apartment. You basically need a house, either one with a basement, a shed or a garage.

      Gardening: requires a garden, something you’re unlikely to have unless you have your own house.

      Photography: I don’t know anybody who is into photography who hasn’t sunk a lot of money into the hobby. There’s the cameras, the lenses, and even the software these days.

      Astronomy: see above.

      Hiking: not expensive on its own, but in North America it means being able to drive to a wilderness spot outside the city, so you pretty much require your own car.

      Archery and blacksmithing: again, requires a specialized space

      Now, I know that there are cheap options for a lot of these. A musician could be someone drumming on an upside-down pail. Someone who only has access to a hotplate could still experiment with food. Woodworking could be just whittling sticks found in the park. Gardening could just be tending to a small houseplant. But, are these the version of the hobbies the women are picturing when they’re imagining a potential mate doing the activity? Probably not.

      Meanwhile, a lot of the stuff at the bottom of the list are very cheap hobbies. Like being influenced by the “Manosphere” just requires access to social media, same with porn and “arguing online”.

      Honestly, it looks to me like if you sorted the list by “dollars per hour someone invested in that hobby is likely to spend” you’d get many of the same things at the top and many of the same ones at the bottom. Some of the few exceptions are writing and reading, which can be pretty cheap hobbies, but are still apparently very attractive.

      • Asafum@feddit.nl
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        3 days ago

        For astronomy (really astrophotography, which is considered even more expensive) I guess it depends on what you consider expensive. For $500 and with 3 free software products I’m able to produce stuff like this:

        A rather large telescope (8" dobsonian reflector) I have as well was “only” $500. So it can be a hobby that you don’t need to spend all that much on, but again that depends on what we consider expensive. $500 is definitely not cheap but I’m just a schmuck in a factory and I could save for that.

        • merc@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          I’m sure you know other people spending thousands on their gear. Anyhow, many of these hobbies can be done relatively cheaply, but I imagine the woman picturing the man doing it as someone who wasn’t going the ultra-cheap route.

          Nice picture btw. How far do you have to travel to get somewhere where there’s a low enough level of light pollution that you can take a picture like that?

          • Asafum@feddit.nl
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            2 days ago

            Thanks! I’m lucky enough to live in a bortle 4 zone so that was taken right outside my house, it’s just processed a bit to pull out the colors and darken the background.

            • merc@sh.itjust.works
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              15 hours ago

              Cool stuff, I live in a city. Not a huge city, but big enough that I only see the major stars at night. It would probably take me at least 45 minutes of driving to get somewhere dark enough to take a picture like yours (assuming I had all the equipment and skill to take that kind of picture at all).

    • Piemanding@sh.itjust.works
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      5 days ago

      I remember listening to some pop song and realizing that it was basically “You love me 'cause I’m rich”. Do you like trashing hotel rooms, going places you have never been? I don’t remember what song it was or the exact lyrics, but I just hated the guy then and there.

      • eatCasserole@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        There was this study where they asked a theater full of women to rate the attractiveness of men, based on a photo and a profession. Then they changed all the professions (but kept the same photos) and did it again.

        The same picture with a higher-paying job was rated significantly higher.

        • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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          4 days ago

          Wealth and social status and what those can provide are just attractive features to people.

      • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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        5 days ago

        Depends.

        If they flaunt it with their fancy cars and designer clothes, I think they’re gross.

        If they look like a hobo but are highly educated about finances… Aaaaay bay bee how you doin? Wink at me, you economist with a 401K who ties her hair up because she hasn’t showered in days because she was doing data science. Spit in my mouth, you engineer with a diverse stock portfolio who wears the same hoodie you wore in college because clothes shopping is hard and you want to focus on optimizing your CI pipelines. Choke me, you tenured professor with a mature retirement fund who dedicated their life building physics engines to teach grad students.

        • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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          5 days ago

          I wasn’t saying it’s like that for everyone but rather in a generalized way being wealthy seems to be a factor in making someone seem more attractive.

    • Tar_Alcaran@sh.itjust.works
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      5 days ago

      I love being in other countries and meeting new people and learning about their culture. But I fucking haaaaate traveling.

    • Fredselfish@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      I have shit ton of these, man I am the sexiest man alive /s.

      These all great traits, I remember to include them if I ever have to go back out into the dating world. Please I hope that never happens.