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It’s software put on every machine so that the company can quickly isolate it if/when something bad happens (or it falls out of security compliance). To do this is requires a constant Internet connection, insanely high privileges on the machine and frequent updates to be appraised of risks.
That risk update went off the rails and into the next state.
I beg to differ. Wood phone cases hide the bump by increasing the total thickness of the phone and making the back nice and flat.